Nº. 1 of  30

Try To Remember.

Or Leave it here to forget.

Cloud Like Mind.

I remember that one time when I thought I might have had something that felt a little or a lot like love for a stranger. It’s that sort of funny that you laugh with but your eyebrows are farrowed and your eyes squint into a circle instead of an oval…but your mouth is laughing…really your mouth is the only part laughing. Because truth is, maybe that thing didn’t really exist or maybe it did. It’s like trying to figure out the meaning of life, or how big the universe it… you can have ideas but you don’t really know. Like love, you don’t really know what love feels like or really is really… You know what not having what you want feels like…and that may be a bit like the idea of “heart break”, but your heart isn’t really breaking, you’re just being a spoiled brat or reliving some sort of trauma you experienced when you were 1.5 years old or something like that. Or…or maybe it is love or something like that. But either way, it doesn’t matter, because it isn’t present. It’s not now, so it doesn’t exist. But sometimes I can’t help going backwards and remembering what that potential four letter word smelled like, sounded like, and how I could feel it’s presence behind me walking towards me. I think sometimes too much going on makes you not know what’s going on. Like, you build up all of this stuff for you to do and “be a part of” then realize, hopefully, that you aren’t a part of anything because you are too busy trying to be a part of something. But if your self-reliance gets the better of you, if you are so stubborn and set on wanting to do it yourself, because you think that makes you independent, then yes, well yes, you will die alone. Because you were too set on building that house, brick by brick..with your own hand and hand.

"Cloud Like Mind…Cloud Like Mind….Cloudlikemind"

slnnn:

Kahve günüymüş. #coffeeday #internationalcoffeeday #coffeeandcigarettes #jimjarmusch #tomwaits #iggypop #coffee

slnnn:

Kahve günüymüş. #coffeeday #internationalcoffeeday #coffeeandcigarettes #jimjarmusch #tomwaits #iggypop #coffee

delilahis:

by Richard Kern

delilahis:

by Richard Kern

6- maybe 4?- 14

Third eye tellin’ me to see now

But I’m still lookin’ for your grin
And you come to me like a Ghost
Now, your stuck here sittin’ somewhere in between
Now this crystal, she won’t speak to me.

An echo & a wind. An echo & a wind.

But when you left you replaced yourself with this chill
and in my heart, I beg and say “stay still!”
and you wouldn’t stop moving me. You say ” push me, still”..

So i’ll not keep on
no, i won’t keep on
but, come on..
I can’t stay still.

And I’m tryin’ to hear you baby
And I’m trying to listen to the truths

So I’ll not keep on
no, I can’t keep on
I gotta, just gotta stay still.

6 - maybe 5? - 14

From your roads direction tonight
my moon still stalks me, as you shoot my arrows down.

Through your memory I expose my chest
open n’ bare

There’s proof in my habits that I can at any moment’s push, no longer care

And I was fine ‘till you came and crossed my lines
And you were fine crossing lines alone

But now your clenched fists are fightin’ off what you think you already know
And my clenched fists are holding onto something I’ve been ‘just one’ long enough to know.

What if I think that you can hear me, hear in my head?
What does it mean to be haunted by your spells as I lay in my bed?

And as I fight to replay - I fight to erase
That smile up on both our faces

I wonder if you feel me
like a Ghost you knew so well
Feel me like you’ve felt me a million times.

And I was fine wondering this road all alone
until you came and took my sticks n’ stones

6-7-14

I wanna know your face as you wake into the morning.
And hear the voice only you get to hear.

I want the pieces we carry & stack up over & over
to fall down all around our knees.

I don’t want this taste in my mouth to wash away.
But instead, blister my tongue with it’s sweetness and heat.
Like a sun that is free to shine deep and long.
Like an inhaling wind that burns holes in my lungs.

Not to be covered up with an artificial light
that looks and seems, but just ain’t right.

6-7-14

The idea,
the point of it,
why it draws you in and you can’t understand but do, even still understand.
It’s because it’s the unmemorable moment when the mind separates from the world we are attuned to, and disconnects and becomes pure and free.

That’s it I think…
It’s when the mind becomes free.
And looking at it, in the future, your future, you can hear the voice and can communicate with it because it IS part of it.
And actually is memorable but on a different plane.

It Connects together. An unspoken language.

It doesn’t make sense because WE created sense. There is no such thing as ‘sense’.

'Sense' is a man made illusion.

6-9-14

I have this weight.
it’s taking my energy, emptying me out.

I am exhausted & I feel like I am anticipating something that won’t come.

But I can’t let it down, I can’t put this weight down.

My body tingles, my head feels light & foggy.
I feel clouded & I just want your arms wrapped tight around me.
And I would like some simplicity.

I let the record continue to spin
long after the music stops.

My breath is trying to catch up to a breathing it doesn’t recognize anymore.
And I can sit and think your spirit is here,
But truth is, that no Ghost awakens unless it has unfinished business.
But you never had any business to begin with.

Joseph Szabo

Joseph Szabo

Minimal compact on repeated scenes

Nº. 1 of  30